Wednesday, November 21, 2012

What do I have to be thankful about?

As I started my 30 Days of Thanksgiving 2012 this year I started out thinking, all of this is going to be about PAIN.  Why?  I could say that it was the wish of Rest Ministries to discuss pain each day, but it wasn't.  It's because I started out
in the ER with a kidney stone that blew through my right kidney.  I slept (right, more like I cat napped for one hour at a time all through the night) there one night.  They seemed perplexed that I couldn't pass any urine.  Well that's why I was there...  I had urinary problems.  <enter sarcasm in the above>

So I sat there talking to my husband (THANK YOU LORD FOR UNITING JOHN AND I IN MARRIAGE ALMOST 20 YEARS AGO!) and thank you for two wonderful step son (grown men).  My husband sat with me until I started to get sleepy and then he went home.  One thing that I've learned is that my husband will support me through anything!  Because ladies, if your man will pull apart the catheter tubes and clean the urine off of them with sterile alcohol wipes and measure your urine and keep track of it in on a tablet, every single time you pee!

So I started writing my days of thanks!  Each one of them was written in total fear.  I basically was on the end of the lifeline and telling God that I do trust him but would He "really" take care of me?  My final diagnosis with my kidneys is that:  1.  The left kidney is super small.  2.  The right kidney is the only one working.  The left one doesn't do a thing.  That was the toughest thing to do and I put all my trust in my husband and my mom (a registered nurse) and my doctors (as I should) but what an awful burden that was for my incredible husband.   So I started reading (well my husband started reading this book to me) "Do You Trust Me?"  <Allowing Hope to Triumph Over Tragedy> by Jessica Leigh Johnson.   This book is about this mother's struggle while having lost her daughter to death at the age of 4.   As John read the pages all I could think was, "How can I be so scared of this when that mother went through the loss of her daughter?"


My husband faces his own surgery in the New Year or maybe earlier if they say he has to.  It's related to his colon.  That upsets me immediately because his mom (90 years young!) has/had cancer of the colon.  She's in the nursing home on Hospice.  So all the while he realized that he missed his own appointment where the Dr. would tell him what his surgery is all about and when to schedule it.  Thank the Lord that TODAY he found out that his appointment is next Tuesday.  I'll be doing anything for him with that appointment!

What I didn't want to do this year was have a GENERIC Thanksgiving!  Like putting up the typical quizzes, facts, recipes, The best in Thanks Pinning, decorations for the house, etc...


And this definitely didn't make me smile because it's that time
again when my husband and I and our landlord get very depressed.  For my husband and I we see a therapist and have medication, but a good friend who is a neighbor is very depressed and physically feeling bad.  So we try to step in and do some little things to break him out of that mood and into something happy.  But we don't want to step on his feet because I know that the one thing that I wished had happened the most for us is that someone brought us a covered dish meal and help break us out of our depression.   John made a delicious meal that we Californians enjoy year-round...  Avocado Potato Salad.  OMGOSH!  It is to die for!  If you want the recipe, let me know in the comments.   Thanks!

So let me tell you what I think about that verse "A cheerful heart is good medicine."  I think no matter what it takes we should try to get ourselves happy again.  Maybe it's the Bible for some, reading good books (secular and non secular) or watch incredibly goofy shows (and for me it's reality tv at night before I go to sleep because I like that my life is not that bad or made up to be that bad).  You find your thing...  is it crafts?  Blogging?  Earning extra money?  Giving to the ones who have less than you?  Random acts of Kindness?  Not shopping on Black Friday?  Waiting a little bit longer this year to put up the Christmas Decorations except for ONE decoration!  Try to put it somewhere that is out of plain sight and visit with it when you want.  Then all of a sudden you will find that you can take out two decorations and then three and so on!  Or whatever your faith is and what you practice or don't practice.

Articles about Depression and the Holidays: CLICK HERE

Wishing you all the best for each day til we reach the end of the year!  And then guess what... it's a NEW YEAR!  Maybe you should do like John and I do and hang up the MISTLETOE first!  And do it at the kitchen or bedroom...  and watch miracles happen.                               

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